Skip to content


“Just for today…

DSC_0217

… l will be free of two pests: worry and indecision.”

There is very little I am certain of. But I was sure on Saturday that I was going to do something for Japan.  The weather was beautiful. When I stepped outside, it became clear to me that my seven-year-old daughter and I needed to set up a table on our town’s pedestrian mall and fold origami cranes. We’d sell them for $1–or however much anyone wanted to pay. The money would go to Global Giving‘s tsunami relief efforts.

I loaded a desk from my office into the back of our car. Inside the house, my daughter made signs explaining our purpose. “Cranes $1. Please help Japan!”  With an ease that could only be divinely-derived, I found a stash of pristine origami paper, two folding chairs, and a jar with lid. Just like that, we were in business.

On the mall, hundreds of people strolled by, basking in the springtime sun. Many were out-of-towners, attending the Virginia Festival of the Book. My daughter and I set up our table half-way between two ice cream shops. Heads bent, we began folding.

Two creases into our first cranes, a young family approached our table. They watched and waited as our squares of patterned paper morphed into triangles, diamonds, kite-shapes, and finally, cranes. A little girl pressed a dollar bill into my hand, then skipped off with her paper bird. As I listened to my daughter unscrew the metal ring of our money jar, something uncorked in me. It was a symphony of relief and hope. However faint, I heard a sacred note of control.

For the next two hours we were greeted by a steady stream of visitors of many religions, races, ages, and nationalities. Some wanted simply to donate; others requested orgiami lessons which we happily gave. All conveyed warmth and generosity for the Japanese people.

Just as we were about to pack up, a Japanese family visiting from Maryland came by our table. They were drawn by the Japanese & American flags my daughter had made.  I explained that I’d been a high school exchange student in Japan and wanted, in some small way, to help those so desperately in need. The wife shared that they were from Osaka but living in the D.C. area for a year’s work. She began to weep when she saw the cranes and the collection jar. Together we huddled over a map of Japan. Out of the mothballs came my lame Japanese, splotched with nouns and verbs from the wrong languages–the French and Italian I’ve studied but never mastered. The wife embraced my efforts and offered up what she could in English. While we talked, our daughters busily creased paper, then exchanged creations: a heart and a crane.  My husband and son arrived a few minutes later to help us load the car.  We snapped a photo of our two families: four parents and four children.

Between the hours of 2 and 4 p.m. my daughter and I folded thirty cranes. Generous donors gave us one hundred and fifty-one dollars. At 5 p.m., through the wireless whisper of the internet, the money we collected flew around the globe to a gentle and grieving nation.

IMG00373-20110319-1621

Posted in General.


Wednesday Night, 11 p.m.

robes

If you hear fabric rustling at bedtime, it’s me climbing up the robes of God. I grab onto the towering folds of white cloth and pull up, fist over fist. What I’m after is a glimpse of that rope belt through the blinding light above. Woven lengths of golden jute. A sign that I’m getting somewhere, going up.

My kids are onto me.  I tell them in simple terms that I’m sad. “Mommy and Daddy are worried about their work. And we’re grieving for the Japanese people.” We haven’t told them yet that their school is closing its doors in June because of the economy. We’d never say that we’re exhausted from seven years of parenting with no local support and no days off. That we’re up at night worrying about retirement and saving for their college.

Cool drinks of water come in the nick of time, in unexpected, unhonorific places. In the grocery store bathroom, a woman in the next stall hears me instructing my daughter. “Never sit on the seat. It may look clean, but you can’t see germs. And remember, push down.” When we come out, the woman says, “It is a pleasure to witness good parenting.” My battery recharges.

But it drains again between 3 and 6 pm. The kids fight and cry because they’re tired and hungry. Everything in the pantry requires an overnight soak and four hours of simmering. I send three texts to babysitters and four emails to friends trying to secure just one hour of childcare so I can attend a teacher conference. At the last minute, a fifth friend offers to turn her afternoon into a pretzel to spot me.

I fall into bed after reading too many stories about Japan. Count my blessings. Say prayers for the suffering. Climb the robes.

*

Image from Titian’s “Annunciation.”

Posted in General.

Tagged with , , .


To Japan

PICT0009

Last year marked the twenty-fifth anniversary of the summer I spent in Japan as a high-school exchange student. During the last six months I’ve been filming short lengths of video about the extraordinary experience I had there. My hope has been to make a video “thank you” for my host parents, who welcomed me into their home and treated me as one of their own. To this day, I call them “Otoosan” and “Okaasan,” father and mother.

My husband, children and I visited Washington, D.C. last August. While we were there, I returned to the Japanese Embassy and the U.S. Capitol. These were among the places where, at sixteen, I was fortunate to meet with Japanese and American officials before departing for Tokyo.

Yesterday there was an earthquake off the coast of Japan.  The extent of damage and lives lost from the earthquake and tsunami are still unknown.

Below is a link to the small clips I filmed in Washington last summer.  My husband lived in Tokyo for three years after college, so Japan dwells in both of our hearts. We send our hope and prayers to our loved ones there, and to all the Japanese people.  We hope that readers of this blog will do what they can to help them recover from this devastating disaster.

To Japan

Posted in Coconut Girl Videos, General.

Tagged with , .


Tape Game

Escape the tape! "The High Road" by the Feelies gets them running

Escape the tape! "The High Road" by the Feelies gets them running

Time to play the Tape Game! Born of winter desperation, this simple romp is now enjoyed year-round chez Coconut Girl.  Here’s how it’s done:

1. Get a roll of tape. Give it to another grown-up or big kid while you…

2. …make some music.  Play an instrument or put on a rock-out song.

3. Tell young kids to run by you and the Taper (the Taper is silly/friendly, not scary/bullish)

4.  The Taper tries to affix short pieces of tape to the children while they fly past.

Rules:
1. Cover sharp corners of counters/furniture before starting.

2. All children must run in the same direction.

3. When the music stops, everyone must freeze!

4. Kids must keep wearing tape pieces until the game is over so that they can be counted.  The child with the lowest number wins.

5. Remove all tape from kids’ clothes before throwing them in the laundry. Otherwise, you’ll notice that a linty piece of it has journeyed to your shirt cuff while unrolling blueprints for a client.

*Bonus:*

The Taper can move around so that when the kids come running back in, they find him in a different spot. This forces them to come up with new moves to escape the tape.  Squeals of surprise ensue. The key is simply is simply to move, not to hide and jump out (which can be scary).

Cheap Date: An evening of entertainment for $0.79

Cheap Date: An evening of entertainment for $0.79

The tickle tally. Remember to check hair!

The tickle tally. Remember to check hair!

Posted in General.


Anti-terrorism Measure

photo

We were at the airport on Sunday, headed out of town for a few days. At the security gates, we went through the usual procedures: we removed our shoes and belts, had all our luggage x-rayed, and walked through metal detectors. Somehow we sidestepped the full-body scan and pat-down. Despite all the talk-show jokes to the contrary, everyone was courteous, TSA staffers and passengers alike. The line flowed at a slow but steady pace.

On board the airplane, a flight attendant asked for everyone’s cooperation. The plane was full and there were families traveling with small children. Joe and the kids were on one side of the aisle and I was on the other. A mother of two came towards us, burdened with two bulging backpacks and a tired, drapey toddler. Her ten-year old son followed behind, pulling a suitcase. “We’re here,” she said to him, nodding towards the two empty seats on my right.

It’s a pleasure to watch a professional work. In less than 90 seconds the mother had slipped past me and settled her family into the crammed row. Quickly she assembled a bottle for her toddler, whose eyes were heavy with fatigue. She saw the wave of sleep approaching and intended to catch it. The mother shifted her little boy into a position on her lap that she could sustain for the next two hours. She rocked her son in a rhythm unbroken even by the pilot’s sudden and blaring announcements about the vagaries of our flight.

After ten minutes in the air, I looked over to my neighbors in the row. The toddler was asleep, and his big brother, too. The boys leaned on their mother in complete trust. She was the ultimate anti-terrorism measure, all-seeing and perceptive beyond the capabilities of the most sophisticated imaging machines. Love, secured well-before a child’s earliest memory, and guarded safely at 30,000 feet.

Posted in Bits of Beauty.

Tagged with , .


Shop on ‘The Coconut Girl Channel!’

Tune in as co-hosts Darcy Larsen and the Coconut Girl showcase fabulous products for new mothers. Whether it’s a mom’s first baby or her fifth, she’ll love these practical and stylish items designed just for her. This week’s segment features products to help Mom get through the lonnnnnnng day with a newborn. Stay tuned for an upcoming show that boasts food and fun items for those first six weeks home with baby.

Special thanks to Jennifer Hoyt Tidwell and Billy Hunt of Powhatan Studios.

Posted in Coconut Girl Videos, Planet Newborn, Wack Art.

Tagged with , , , .


Working on a Building

With Playdoh and toothpicks my daughter worked for days on a math assignment at school. She was given a list of requirements to meet. Build a three-dimensional structure with at least ten faces.  Fifteen intersections. Twenty corners.  She had to leave the project at school each day, but the work stayed with her long after she returned home.  At night I’d clear the dinner dishes, and she’d fill in the empty table space with drawing paper and pens, sketching out her next move on the structure.

“Mom, can you show me how to draw something three-dimensional?” she asked one night. I joined her at the table and sketched a square. Last year in kindergarten art we studied Robert Indiana’s three-dimensional  L-O-V-E sculpture. But she was thinking about geometry now. “See, you draw two squares, one above and to the side of the other. Then connect the corners,” I explained. That was all she needed. She drew cubes. Then bricks. The lines were sweetly askew, but pulling forward on the page all the same, holding space and possibility.

I returned to the dishes, then went hunting for clean pajamas for my son. Passing through the dining room, I saw that my daughter was onto something else involving Popsicle sticks and tape. She worked silently, head bent.  I found other things to do.

Fifteen minutes elapsed. I could hear the hushed tones of my husband reading bedtime stories to our son upstairs. If I corralled my daughter now, she’d still have time for a splashy, sing-song bath without disrupting her brother’s sleep.

By 8:00 we got it all done: bath, PJs, homework, milk, brushing, flossing, and a chapter of The Incredible Journey. Her head nodded with exhaustion while I read to her. I came downstairs and went to the dining room table. What had she been working on so intently before bath time?  There was a drawing, and a sculpture. Both cubes. In the span of one evening, she’d been both architect and builder.

The cube remains in our dining room. I looked at it often last week while I listened to news stories about Egypt, Bahrain, and Wisconsin. There is hope and power in building something new, whether it’s a bridge between synapses in the brain, a movement, or a nation. And there is beauty in the scrappy messiness of it, too: the racked sides of the Popsicle stick cube, the sooty cobblestones removed and then replaced in the streets of Cairo, and the rough draft of the Declaration of Independence.

“If I was a gambler, I tell you what I’d do
I’d quit my gambling and I’d work on the building, too.”

-Bill Monroe “Working on a Building”

Posted in Learning from Others.


“Like,” the Verbal Funyun

funyuns

In our dining room I’m thinking of rigging up one of those wires that hangs above a billiards table.  You know, the kind that holds wood beads for keeping score. But instead of pocket shots, I’ll be counting the word “like” when it crops up in our familial discourse. In lieu of beads, I’ll use Fuyuns—-an irresistible non-food that fills the belly with junk, just as “like” fills the mind with vacuous static.

I’ll probably be the first to get busted. “Like” falls out of my mouth too often, especially if I’m ranting about something to a friend. But I am conscious not to use it as a substitute for “about.” I’ll say “he seems about 50 years old,” rather than “he seems, like, 50 years old.”  It’s kind of a crusade of mine to use the word “said” when recounting conversations with others. Even still, I will hear myself say “she was like, ‘give me that drumstick.'” All caught up in the chicken leg tale, I let my grammatical guard down. Bam, “like” worms into my speech. All the while, my young children listen intently. When they talk, I correct their “likes” but it’s more important that I model good English for them.

Sometimes on Sunday mornings we venture into the local bagel shop favored by UVa undergraduates. While we wait in line holding our kids, my husband and I brace ourselves for tales of campus keg stands and jello shooters. Instead, we’re pelted with “likes” that rain down like thousands of Funyun paratroopers invading the shores of intelligent conversation. “I don’t know, I was just like, you know, like, call me, or like, don’t!”  We set our kids down and cover their ears. I’ve heard it said that the foundation of a child’s lifelong nutritional health is in place by age five. There’s probably a similar benchmark for language. A few Funyuns are ok every now and then. But day to day, we’re trying to build something healthier.  billiards score chain

Posted in General.

Tagged with , .


A Mudroom in 3 Easy Pieces

A

1. At the entry, a "Malm" table from IKEA collects different but compatible storage bins: a basket for backpacks, box-files to sort mail, kids' shoe cubbies, and a toy box for adult shoes.

For the last two decades, mudrooms have been all the rage in residential design. For good reason. Imagine a single, orderly repository for all the coats, backpacks and shoes that can overtake a home. But what to do if a home’s entry offers only a puny coat closet? Deconstruct, that’s what. Not the closet, but the notion of what a mudroom looks like.

In our 1940’s-era house, we’ve tamed the post-school & post-work piles by creating three storage areas near the entrance. Just inside the door is a place for backpacks, shoes, and mail. (photo 1).  A few strides away, a pair of bureaus holds mittens, scarves, hats, and foldable outerwear like fleece pullovers (photo 2). And our house’s original coat closet accommodates coats and boots (photo 3).  The adults’ coats go on the hanging rack, and the children’s go on pegs placed low for self-service. Above are heavy-duty hooks for purses and briefcases. The total cost of the “mudroom addition”: about $320. Matching finishes and embellishments like plants and lamps make the storage areas attractive as well as functional.

DSC_0145

2. Matching bureaus from IKEA. Drawers hold winter accessories & umbrellas for each family member.

DSC_0148

3. The house's original coat closet gets a fresh coat of blue paint and low pegs for the children. Wind chimes hiding among the adult coats offer notes of calm during the morning rush.

Posted in Design.


Window Dialogue

DSC_0190

The latest installment of seeing my life through the eyes of my college art history professor. Please read in a pseudo-English accent.  For others in the series, click here.

The artist group “Duo” debuted its latest work, “Window Dialogue” last week.  A grid of catty-wumpus blue Post-it notes surrounds a found-object glass prism on a residential double-hung window. Sometimes two per pane, sometimes one, the blue squares suggest a message-in-a-bottle urgency. “Get us out of here,” they seem to cry, trapped inside their feverish cabin by a mere 1/8″ of glass. If they could just break through to swirl in the wind like the unbagged leaves from October, gathered in slimey piles outside.  “Transcend your condition,” the prism chides the 3M progeny.  Harnessing the sun’s rays, the crystal brings the outside in, projecting spectacular rainbows on the surrounding walls and floor. “There’s weatherstripping on your facet,” a Post-it volleys back.  Yes, stuck after all, the prism turns out to be–tethered by the proverbial toilet-paper-on-the shoe.

DSC_0189

Posted in Art 101.